So I’ve been sick and in a major funk since mid September. I basically came back from an AMAZING weekend at the GFAFexpo in NJ and all my plans fall apart.
The Wednesday after we got back, I severely sprained my ankle. Bad enough that I actually broke down and went to the ER to have it looked at. My lovely (and costly) ER visit showed no breaks (yay!) but gave me Bronchitis. Two months later I still have Bronchitis. I went to the ER again for it last night as the wheezing was so bad I couldn’t stand it anymore.
In the past 2 months, I have be doing a ton of work on the house. I had a 15 foot dumpster that I used to declutter the house.
While it feels amazing to have so much space back in the house, its a bit overwhelming and sad at the same time. There are still so many more projects that I want to do to get the house in its prime again. I just don’t have the means whether it be money, time or skill set, to do so at this moment.
In October we had some great friends visit from Syracuse. We missed them so much and tried to squeeze in so many fun activities while they were here. Sky zone, pumpkin patch, pumpkin carving and so much more.. all in a few days. Then I have a mere few days to put together a Buckethead Zombie from Plants Vs. Zombies 2 for Riley’s Halloween costume. Thanks to a lovely neighbor on the eve before Halloween, the jacket managed to be trimmed down to Riley’s size. We had a great time trick or treating with his girlfriend Callie and her little sister Emma.
There has been many great moments over the last 2 months but that doesn’t erase the fact that a majority of that time I felt like utter crap. Physically, mentally, emotionally.. just every way possible. I was not/have not been myself. Physically – Coughing for weeks on end drains you. I am so sore for just coughing. Mentally – Some days I feel like I’m lucky to know my own name by the time I get off work, pick up Riley, make dinner and help with homework. Emotionally – I feel like I have let everyone down. From the lovely people at the GAFAexpo that let me be a blogger for the event and I didn’t get my post expo review up yet, to all the amazing vendors at the expo that I’ve been starting draft after draft blog post but can’t get passed the funk to make it a post worthy of posting, to my friends, to Riley… Little things with Riley hit me harder than I expect. He was looking forward to Cub Scouts but then after the meeting he made the comment that he didn’t want to do it cause he didn’t have a dad like the other boys. (I think the knife from that remark is still in my heart.) I feel like I’m letting myself down cause I don’t have Why Can’t Wheat Be Friends? where I’d like it to be and I’m not sure when I will be able to afford to get it to that place.
In just a few short days, I will finally get to spend time with one of my best friends in person. I can not wait to get to spend Thanksgiving with Ashley and her little family. A week away from my day to day life, a different air to breathe, space.. I’m looking forward to it all. I’m praying that some good ol’ fashion girl time is what I need to lift this funk. I’m determined to get WCWBF’s out there. I’m determined to blog more.. do more social media.. just be a bigger part of the gluten free community that I love so much. And thanks to an amazing gift of an iPhone 6, I no longer have to deal with spiderweb screen cracks that made staying in touch annoying beyond words.
Through this funk I have been baking and reviewing products. I have enough post in queue that I could not back or buy a new product for close to a year and still have material. I just need to find my voice on the blog again.